disgusted…

What is the difference between Yahoo publishing photos of Sadam Hussein’s dead sons and Al Jazeera showing the video of dead and captured American soldiers during the war? The United States was sooooo self-righteous about that incident. Now the first thing I see when I turn on my computer today is a photo of Qusai’s dead, bloody body. I feel like throwing up.

Claustrophobia is all over me today. So many wrong things in this world, and I can’t get away from them. Even gravity — can’t escape it. And this body… these aligners are making me crazy. My gums are sore, and each time I take them out to eat, I have to brush my teeth and brush the aligners before I put them back in. It makes snacking nearly impossible. But not wearing them is not an attractive alternative because of the rough cement nodules on my teeth that irritate my tongue. And that makes me feel trapped, impeded, caged. I had the same feeling on the elliptical trainer at the gym tonight. Boxed in. Restrained. Yeah, even though no one is forcing me to do these things. But if I don’t… this body holds me, requires maintenance. I don’t have children, but I still have to take care of myself. I’m not complaining, mind you. Just describing a feeling.

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